Sheep vs. Fence

Title: Sheep vs. Fence

Logline:  A grizzled sheep rancher and the obstinate ewe he raised from a lamb continually square off in a comic battle of wits and wires.


On a previous visit to my friend Lisa’s A Land of Grass Ranch in northwestern Montana—make that visits, plural—we fixed sheep fence in the continuing battle against entropy. The ongoing nature of the repairs, and the many opportunities for chaos and comedy that could result from animals in the wrong place at the wrong time gave me the idea for a new TV comedy series, Sheep vs. Fence.

In Sheep vs. Fence, the human team is led by Walt, a grizzled, experienced sheep rancher. Walt enlists his well-intentioned but goofy son-in-law and a book-smart professor at a local agricultural college to keep fences in good repair and the animals under control. The critter team, however, has other ideas. Virginia, the stubborn ewe Walt raised as a bum lamb, gets help from anything with four legs to find their way to the good stuff—because the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

Sometimes the humans win a round, and sometimes the animals do—and that’s when Walt gets a call from his irate neighbor, a cattleman prejudiced against sheep in the first place.

Here’s a snippet from the pilot episode.


SCENE 1

WALT picks up the telephone.

WALT

Hello?

NEIGHBOR’S VOICE

Walt, the sheep are out in my north section again.

WALT

(groans)

NEIGHBOR’S VOICE

When you gonna fix that fence Walt?

WALT

I’m on it.

(hangs up)

Saddle up boys.

EXT. DAYLIGHT.

WALT and DEWEY survey the hole in the fence.

WALT

(Throws hat on the ground)

God DAMN it Virginia!

I raised you from a LAMB! And this is how you repay me?

VIRGINIA stares back at WALT from a safe distance.

(To be continued)


Read more about life on a real ranch in Prairie Ponderings: Adventures in Raising Your Food.

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